June morning


days of waking up and feeling melancholy

missing the past

or rather the missing of feelings I had in the past

of waking up next to a lover smiling at me

the sun kissing my face, eyes closed, swinging in the backyard, thinking of nothing

worrying about nothing


melancholy turning to lethargy

wrench myself from the bed and sit down on the cushion


do my morning Mahayana practice

vowing to make myself available for all sentient beings

get over myself (actually, saying the words does just that)

practice tonglen

today for myself

pent up tears released flow down my face

breathe in the tender sadness

exhale white light from my heart, radiating in all directions

it takes only a few minutes for the transformation to take place

I feel better

so much so that I forget my practice

oh yeah, breathe in that sadness of others

exhale white light from my heart and let it radiate out in all directions

send it out into the world


get up and make tea

put on some music

move my hips with the beat

another form of transformation


Jen MurphyComment